Photos courtesy of Kelly Schmandt. Thanks Kelly!
Friday, February 24, 2012
Snow! Day Two
Can't get enough of the cuteness and the fun. On day two of our snow adventures our friends joined our little family of four and we ramped things up a bit with the sledding. The big kids may have just gotten a little too extreme in their sledding (pictures of the really crazy stuff - think snow embedded deep in nostrils - not pictured to protect the innocent). Of course, the little kids (A & E) were more than happy to ramp things up a notch too.
Photos courtesy of Kelly Schmandt. Thanks Kelly!
Photos courtesy of Kelly Schmandt. Thanks Kelly!
Wednesday, February 22, 2012
More Shorts
Day Two after the big snow adventure and all is well with the world (Wait! Am I jinxing things by sending this out to the universe via the interwebs?). Day One was a little rough. The kids were certainly a bit off and at each other's throats more than usual. Our more easily dysregulated kiddo was struggling, BUT, really, Day One was pretty darn smooth overall, especially compared to the fall outs we've experienced after past big adventures and routine-disruptors.
So, yeah, life is pretty good around these parts these days.
Today (Another Gorgeous Day in SoCal)
Sunny and a pleasant low 70's. I got off work early and had a good 45 minutes home alone to expel the stresses of work, the fast pace of our adventurous weekend and the ensuing day back, and settle in to our cozy (as long as you don't include any measure of cleanliness in your definition of cozy) home. I spent the time in our garden, harvesting fresh greens for the night's dinner. Seriously, what's better than harvesting fresh organically grown salad fixings to feed your family in the middle of February?
A Little Later at Dinner
Little man casually announces that he bought a pickle today after school at the Pickle Wednesdays fundraiser with his own money. After discussing how yummy his pickle was I asked for a bit of clarification, "You mean Sierra (babysitter in the mornings and Wednesdays after school) gave you a dollar to buy a pickle?" "No, I pay with mine money." "You mean Sierra gave you a dollar and you took it up to the pickle stand and paid for your own pickle?" "No mom. I pay with mine money. Money in pig."
The kids are pretty much rolling in dough. Well-meaning relatives spoil them regularly with cash (yet another reason why they love mail), which we promptly order them to stuff in their piggy banks and ignore. Maybe I shouldn't admit it, but, for the past year, I have absolutely relished in the fact that I have a 6 and 7 year old that really have no concept of the power of money and the associated consumerist thirst for all things purchasable. They know what money is for and something you have to work hard for, and they know that they can spend their money on something they really want, but we've also encouraged them to think carefully about what they want to spend their money on because once it's spent, its gone. Frankly, I think the entire concept is a little overwhelming, and, while they express wants from time to time, when we offer to take them to the store to spend their money they always back down and their stash continues to grow.
When I was in charge of the after school pick-up I usually tried to scrounge around the house for $2 to buy each kid a popsicle on Popsicle Thursdays (the older classes at the kids' school sell pickles and popsicles to raise money for their school trips later in the year). I often forgot and would usually find myself in a discussion with Ashagre on why I didn't always have a dollar ready and available for him to buy a popsicle every Thursday. Now in charge of pick-up, Brent has taken a different approach. He's been telling Ashagre that if he wants a pickle or a popsicle he can use his own money to buy one.
Apparently this morning Ashagre took his dad's advice and realized it was Pickle Wednesday (also known around these parts as Whacky Wednesday and Choice Day and No PE Today Day). He took it upon himself to fish a dollar out of his bank and shove it in his pocket to purchase his treasured pickle after school. He did this all by himself without even asking for help, and then casually announced his accomplishment at dinner. Little man seems to be finding some confidence in his inborn ingenuity. Makes his momma proud. Now if we could only figure out how much he paid for that pickle...the school would make sure to give him correct change if he brought in a $10 or a $20, right? (Since Ashagre announced his accomplishment today we've taught him how to figure out how much each bill he has is worth. He has another dollar tucked safely away in his backpack for Popsicle Thursdays tomorrow).
Slightly Later at Dinner
Elsa announces that she wants to be a dentist/doctor when she grows up. She then changes her mind to just a doctor. It's the first time she's ever expressed a desire to be something when she grows up. We talk about the fact that she'll have to work hard in school in order to be a doctor and she says that she knows that already. Her world is becoming full of possibilities and I have no doubt that she'll be a doctor if she wants to be.
Last Saturday Night, A Few Glasses of Wine In
The kids are tucked quietly in their bunk beds and sound asleep after a hard day's play in the snow. Brent, finally given the chance after many months of sleep cut short, passed out before the kids even went to bed and is sleeping soundly in the king adjacent to the kids' bunk bed at my friend Claire's cabin. The rest of the (adult) boys are huddled around a game of dominoes on the floor while their wives and girlfriends catch up over (many) glasses of wine at the table. My friend Ashley brings up the kids, and our last visit to her house in September. It hadn't gone so well. In fact, after that trip we found our current therapist. The kids were really out of control and our more attachment challenged kiddo was spiraling downward. "It's remarkable. I mean, really. They've grown so much. You all have." She goes on to explain the changes she's seeing in our little family of four. "Their trust has grown so much. It's subtle, but its not. Like when they're talking to us (other adults at the cabin) they're continuously checking in with you two, with their eyes. They trust you to guide them and help them navigate things. Really, Dakota, its night and day."
I push back my tears as I weakly thank her for taking the time to point this out. It means more than I can express to hear her words.
Continuously For the Past Several Weeks, Especially Right Before We Head Out the Door For School
Elsa and Ashagre are currently obsessed with this K'Naan song:
Ashagre wants to grow his dreadlocks as long as the man playing soccer solo about half-way through the video and both kids erupt into the chorus regularly throughout the day.
Each time I hear them sing it, especially when Elsa belts it out in her most passionate singing voice I tear up. They've spontaneously sung it multiple times a day for many weeks now, but it still gets me every single time.
When I get older
I will be stronger.
They'll call me freedom
just like the waving flag.
You already are growing stronger my children. You already are, and so is your momma.
So, yeah, life is pretty good around these parts these days.
Today (Another Gorgeous Day in SoCal)
Sunny and a pleasant low 70's. I got off work early and had a good 45 minutes home alone to expel the stresses of work, the fast pace of our adventurous weekend and the ensuing day back, and settle in to our cozy (as long as you don't include any measure of cleanliness in your definition of cozy) home. I spent the time in our garden, harvesting fresh greens for the night's dinner. Seriously, what's better than harvesting fresh organically grown salad fixings to feed your family in the middle of February?
A Little Later at Dinner
Little man casually announces that he bought a pickle today after school at the Pickle Wednesdays fundraiser with his own money. After discussing how yummy his pickle was I asked for a bit of clarification, "You mean Sierra (babysitter in the mornings and Wednesdays after school) gave you a dollar to buy a pickle?" "No, I pay with mine money." "You mean Sierra gave you a dollar and you took it up to the pickle stand and paid for your own pickle?" "No mom. I pay with mine money. Money in pig."
The kids are pretty much rolling in dough. Well-meaning relatives spoil them regularly with cash (yet another reason why they love mail), which we promptly order them to stuff in their piggy banks and ignore. Maybe I shouldn't admit it, but, for the past year, I have absolutely relished in the fact that I have a 6 and 7 year old that really have no concept of the power of money and the associated consumerist thirst for all things purchasable. They know what money is for and something you have to work hard for, and they know that they can spend their money on something they really want, but we've also encouraged them to think carefully about what they want to spend their money on because once it's spent, its gone. Frankly, I think the entire concept is a little overwhelming, and, while they express wants from time to time, when we offer to take them to the store to spend their money they always back down and their stash continues to grow.
When I was in charge of the after school pick-up I usually tried to scrounge around the house for $2 to buy each kid a popsicle on Popsicle Thursdays (the older classes at the kids' school sell pickles and popsicles to raise money for their school trips later in the year). I often forgot and would usually find myself in a discussion with Ashagre on why I didn't always have a dollar ready and available for him to buy a popsicle every Thursday. Now in charge of pick-up, Brent has taken a different approach. He's been telling Ashagre that if he wants a pickle or a popsicle he can use his own money to buy one.
Apparently this morning Ashagre took his dad's advice and realized it was Pickle Wednesday (also known around these parts as Whacky Wednesday and Choice Day and No PE Today Day). He took it upon himself to fish a dollar out of his bank and shove it in his pocket to purchase his treasured pickle after school. He did this all by himself without even asking for help, and then casually announced his accomplishment at dinner. Little man seems to be finding some confidence in his inborn ingenuity. Makes his momma proud. Now if we could only figure out how much he paid for that pickle...the school would make sure to give him correct change if he brought in a $10 or a $20, right? (Since Ashagre announced his accomplishment today we've taught him how to figure out how much each bill he has is worth. He has another dollar tucked safely away in his backpack for Popsicle Thursdays tomorrow).
Slightly Later at Dinner
Elsa announces that she wants to be a dentist/doctor when she grows up. She then changes her mind to just a doctor. It's the first time she's ever expressed a desire to be something when she grows up. We talk about the fact that she'll have to work hard in school in order to be a doctor and she says that she knows that already. Her world is becoming full of possibilities and I have no doubt that she'll be a doctor if she wants to be.
Last Saturday Night, A Few Glasses of Wine In
The kids are tucked quietly in their bunk beds and sound asleep after a hard day's play in the snow. Brent, finally given the chance after many months of sleep cut short, passed out before the kids even went to bed and is sleeping soundly in the king adjacent to the kids' bunk bed at my friend Claire's cabin. The rest of the (adult) boys are huddled around a game of dominoes on the floor while their wives and girlfriends catch up over (many) glasses of wine at the table. My friend Ashley brings up the kids, and our last visit to her house in September. It hadn't gone so well. In fact, after that trip we found our current therapist. The kids were really out of control and our more attachment challenged kiddo was spiraling downward. "It's remarkable. I mean, really. They've grown so much. You all have." She goes on to explain the changes she's seeing in our little family of four. "Their trust has grown so much. It's subtle, but its not. Like when they're talking to us (other adults at the cabin) they're continuously checking in with you two, with their eyes. They trust you to guide them and help them navigate things. Really, Dakota, its night and day."
I push back my tears as I weakly thank her for taking the time to point this out. It means more than I can express to hear her words.
Continuously For the Past Several Weeks, Especially Right Before We Head Out the Door For School
Elsa and Ashagre are currently obsessed with this K'Naan song:
Ashagre wants to grow his dreadlocks as long as the man playing soccer solo about half-way through the video and both kids erupt into the chorus regularly throughout the day.
Each time I hear them sing it, especially when Elsa belts it out in her most passionate singing voice I tear up. They've spontaneously sung it multiple times a day for many weeks now, but it still gets me every single time.
When I get older
I will be stronger.
They'll call me freedom
just like the waving flag.
You already are growing stronger my children. You already are, and so is your momma.
Monday, February 20, 2012
Great Snow Adventure 2012
By all accounts our great snow adventure was a success. The kids LOVED the snow, and, in general, seemed to eat up our adventurous weekend. As soon as we could see snow-covered mountain tops from the freeway Ashagre was abuzz with excitement; if he didn't have his seatbelt on he might have just vibrated right out of his seat. Elsa was prepping us all for proper snow eating with this little ditty as we traveled up the freeway:
It was a great first introduction to snow for our SoCal Ethiopians. The temperatures never dipped even close to freezing, allowing us to play out in the snow until we were all completely exhausted each day. Honestly, by the second day it had been so warm that there really wasn't even much snow to speak of, but we made sure to take full advantage of what was available. We had many, many snowball fights, made snowmen and snow angels, and did some extreme sledding. The kids LOVED sledding and had absolutely no fear. The north Idaho girl in me couldn't get enough of my adorable kids all bundled up in their snow clothes.
The kids handled the weekend's lack of routine and exposure a new group of people really well. Slowly but surely Brent and I are learning how to help them succeed. We did a lot of front-loading so they would know what to expect for the weekend and were crystal clear on what we expected of them. We used concrete examples of other excitement-packed weekends that went well so they had a frame of reference. We also sent an email to our friends to let them know how to help us help the kids feel safe and stay regulated. Originally I felt a little awkward writing the email, but almost every one of our friends thanked us for the information and was happy to know how to best interact with the kids so everyone could enjoy the weekend. Two of our friends that we last saw in September made a point to pull Brent and me aside to let us know how much progress they had seen in the kids trust of us and their resulting behavior (the kids were absolutely off the wall the last weekend we spent with them).
We'll see how the next week plays out as we settle back into our routine. I'm going to continue to keep my expectations low so as not to get overly frustrated if its rough. For now I'll just relish in the success of another family adventure with a vision toward a future with many more to come.
It was a great first introduction to snow for our SoCal Ethiopians. The temperatures never dipped even close to freezing, allowing us to play out in the snow until we were all completely exhausted each day. Honestly, by the second day it had been so warm that there really wasn't even much snow to speak of, but we made sure to take full advantage of what was available. We had many, many snowball fights, made snowmen and snow angels, and did some extreme sledding. The kids LOVED sledding and had absolutely no fear. The north Idaho girl in me couldn't get enough of my adorable kids all bundled up in their snow clothes.
 |
| Uncle Whoosa-Dog in snow. |
The kids handled the weekend's lack of routine and exposure a new group of people really well. Slowly but surely Brent and I are learning how to help them succeed. We did a lot of front-loading so they would know what to expect for the weekend and were crystal clear on what we expected of them. We used concrete examples of other excitement-packed weekends that went well so they had a frame of reference. We also sent an email to our friends to let them know how to help us help the kids feel safe and stay regulated. Originally I felt a little awkward writing the email, but almost every one of our friends thanked us for the information and was happy to know how to best interact with the kids so everyone could enjoy the weekend. Two of our friends that we last saw in September made a point to pull Brent and me aside to let us know how much progress they had seen in the kids trust of us and their resulting behavior (the kids were absolutely off the wall the last weekend we spent with them).
We'll see how the next week plays out as we settle back into our routine. I'm going to continue to keep my expectations low so as not to get overly frustrated if its rough. For now I'll just relish in the success of another family adventure with a vision toward a future with many more to come.
Thursday, February 16, 2012
1 More Day of School
Then go to sleep time. Then wake up REEEEAAAALLLLLY early. Then drive LONNNNGGG time. Then SNOW!
The kids have been counting down the days all week. The energy around our house is off the charts. They are so excited for our first ever trip to the snow.
They already know not to eat yellow snow - a wise piece of advice passed on by the local coffee shop barista (I'm telling you, they're excited - they're telling everyone). They also have an idea of how to make a good snowball and can't wait for a snowball fight (no throwing in face - not nice). Last night a box of snow clothes arrived in the mail from my parents who live up in Idaho where nearly brand new snow clothes are easy to find in local thrift shops. When I got home two little bundled up Ethiopians bounced out to greet me.
While I am super excited to reconnect with friends from grad. school that we never see this weekend, I am working a bit harder to totally embrace the excitement of the upcoming trip. There's that part of my brain that knows that after a big weekend where all routine gets thrown out the window, one of our kids usually comes crashing down in a unavoidably loud and explosive way for (sometimes) weeks afterwards.
Our therapist was pretty pushy with me last week. She wants me to grieve our past life and accept our new normal - to make our world smaller for our kids that can't handle sometimes even the simple things that are out there. Where's the middle ground though? How do we continue to give our kids these enriching experiences - like a trip to see snow for the first time - keep our sanity as adults that are addicted to the myriad of adventures the world has to offer (and hopefully pass that addiction on to E and A), and give our kids what they need too? I think the answer lies somewhere in the exceptions. Keep their wold small on the whole, make exceptions for the big things, know what the consequences will be when you return home, and just go with it without getting too bent out of shape about it. I'll use this weekend to test this philosophy. We'll see how it goes.
The kids have been counting down the days all week. The energy around our house is off the charts. They are so excited for our first ever trip to the snow.
They already know not to eat yellow snow - a wise piece of advice passed on by the local coffee shop barista (I'm telling you, they're excited - they're telling everyone). They also have an idea of how to make a good snowball and can't wait for a snowball fight (no throwing in face - not nice). Last night a box of snow clothes arrived in the mail from my parents who live up in Idaho where nearly brand new snow clothes are easy to find in local thrift shops. When I got home two little bundled up Ethiopians bounced out to greet me.
While I am super excited to reconnect with friends from grad. school that we never see this weekend, I am working a bit harder to totally embrace the excitement of the upcoming trip. There's that part of my brain that knows that after a big weekend where all routine gets thrown out the window, one of our kids usually comes crashing down in a unavoidably loud and explosive way for (sometimes) weeks afterwards.
Our therapist was pretty pushy with me last week. She wants me to grieve our past life and accept our new normal - to make our world smaller for our kids that can't handle sometimes even the simple things that are out there. Where's the middle ground though? How do we continue to give our kids these enriching experiences - like a trip to see snow for the first time - keep our sanity as adults that are addicted to the myriad of adventures the world has to offer (and hopefully pass that addiction on to E and A), and give our kids what they need too? I think the answer lies somewhere in the exceptions. Keep their wold small on the whole, make exceptions for the big things, know what the consequences will be when you return home, and just go with it without getting too bent out of shape about it. I'll use this weekend to test this philosophy. We'll see how it goes.
Tuesday, February 14, 2012
Friday, February 10, 2012
12 Months (No Need For Words)
February 2011
March 2011
April 2011
May 2011
June 2011
July 2011
August 2011
October 2011
November 2011
December 2011
February 2012
Tomorrow we celebrate one year together as a family!
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